its that feeling if you know, that after having the best of life, when I see people and things around me and in reminiscence Its hard to believe I lived the life that I lived in school, with everyone I loved and things were so straight simple and genuine and it was such a purposeful way of life its almost sacrosanct! I am almost scared if I’ll be able to at least live upto my own self, all that I used to be and all that I had, leave alone going higher. I know it makes one seem very small and cocooned but this is really an exception, don’t believe anyone can even understand what I feel and whets more I don’t even expect or want them to understand, it just doesn’t bother me! I am so complete I don’t need anyone! I don’t even know why am I writing all this but it just seemed important to me right now to share this with someone who would understand. I know that my sentences aren’t exactly coherent but just try to understand, things are coming so fast and there is so much to express that my fingers are just no match for the speed of my thoughts. Really don’t know where am I going with life specially now that I have my freedom and getting to know so many things and have to be so careful about everything. I never really gave any importance to suffering, not like I never got affected by it, but that didn’t decide any course of my life and now its just getting harder to fight this feeling. But whom do I give in to?? Nothing is really worth it! And so I must go on, fighting this feeling and not allowing myself to question anything cause only I know that the answer is going to be worse than the question.i don’t know what to call this feeling maybe later on in life I would but I ain’t sure if I would want to know it then too
